Parashat Vayigash

Bereshit 44:18–47:27

Our Parasha opens up with Judah’s heartfelt request to the Prime Minister of Egypt also known, though not to him, as his brother Joseph. As quoted in my Chumash: “With Judah’s selfless offer of himself as a substitute for Benjamin, Joseph finally had irrefutable proof of his brothers’ new attitude, as exemplified by their filial devotion to Jacob, their love for Benjamin and their sincere contrition for their crime against Joseph himself. It was to ascertain this that he had subjected them to all these tribulations to begin with. Moreover, his brothers had already had their share of the expiatory humiliation they deserved. Joseph felt, therefore that the time of reconciliation had at last arrived (Akeidah, Arbabanel, R’ Hirsch).” As the story of this reconciliation is related to us, an important and necessary element in the reuniting of all the brothers emerges. Forgiveness is not the issue here, the truth is, and it must be revealed and acknowledged by both parties. Joseph was always willing to forgive his brothers, but he couldn’t sweep their behavior under the proverbial carpet, that is.. not until they acknowledged what they had done! Any good parent or teacher knows that this is key for true peace to reign making reconciliation possible. Imagine, today, if we tried forcing reconciliation with the Palestinians by forging a peace treaty while they are still teaching their children we stole from them the whole land of Israel and therefore it’s ok to murder us! Sounds insane doesn’t it? And still, even if Israel is willing to forgive all the bloodshed, no amount of force is going to ensure that terrorists won’t rise up to murder on a regular basis. Only when the truth is revealed and acknowledged by both sides can mindsets be changed, making peace possible and paving the way for true reconciliation to happen! Similarly, though Joseph was willing to forgive, he needed to know his brothers’ attitude had changed and would not repeat itself in their treatment of Benjamin. And in fact, the text tells us in Bereshit 45:3 that as Joseph revealed himself to his brothers, “they could not answer because they were undone before him”

וַיֹּ֨אמֶר יוֹסֵ֤ף אֶל־אֶחָיו֙ אֲנִ֣י יוֹסֵ֔ף הַע֥וֹד אָבִ֖י חָ֑י וְלֹא־יָֽכְל֤וּ אֶחָיו֙ לַֽעֲנ֣וֹת אֹת֔וֹ כִּ֥י נִבְהֲל֖וּ מִפָּנָֽיו”

נִבְהֲל֖וּ is more than being undone! They were filled with terror with nowhere to hide as their evil doings and lies were now exposed. But last week’s Parasha also tells us that they knew they deserved what was happening to them as they said to one another: “Indeed we are guilty concerning our brother inasmuch as we saw his heartfelt anguish when he pleaded with us and paid no heed. That is why this anguish has come upon us.” Bereshit 42:21 And truly it had! As Moshe’s saying goes, “Be sure, your sin will find you out.” Bamidbar 32:23 Joseph’s brothers’ sin indeed had found them out! The truth had been revealed! This is also reminiscent of the sin of Cain against his brother Abel when HaShem Himself told him in Bereshit 4:6-7: “Why are you angry and why is your countenance fallen? If you do good, will you not be accepted? But, if not, sin is crouching at the door and its desire is for you, but you must rule over it” As we know, Cain did not rule over it, but murdered his brother and passed his sin on to future generations! We can recognize it working its deadly poison in Joseph’s brothers. But now, in their story, this iniquity takes a different turn because G-d always meant to provide forgiveness since the day Adam and Eve chose to live according to the knowledge of tov and ra, something He knew they could not handle and would destroy humanity. The problem is that you cannot benefit from the joy of forgiveness if you deny that you need it! This is where our Parasha adds to this revelation of forgiveness and teaches us that it was necessary for all the brothers to be brought face to face with the truth of what they had done and be confronted with the reality of where they each “missed the mark”. But it is there that, undone and terrified of what they knew they deserved, “nivaloo” in Hebrew, they can finally receive the redemptive forgiveness of their brother and be reconciled. And so it goes with us as well, without acknowledgment of the truth, reconciliation is not possible. When, like Joseph’s brothers, we find ourselves embroiled in conflicts with the people surrounding us as we “miss the mark” in our behavior, it is our willingness to acknowledge the truth and bear the consequences of the sin that we commit, that is the necessary element for us to receive forgiveness and therefore make reconciliation possible! This usually requires that we, like Joseph’s brothers be found out as well, with no place to hide, “nivhaloo”, undone and terrified, facing not only our evil deeds but also our immense potential for even greater evil. It is there, then, that hope is birthed as the journey of our iniquity can finally be turned around into a path of redemption. Like the brothers who found themselves at the mercy of Joseph, we find ourselves at the mercy of our living G-d. And how great is His mercy for us as the consequences of our bad behavior were never meant to drown us in condemnation and self-hatred but on the contrary to drive us to our need for forgiveness. Only then HaShem’s mercy and provision for redemption can and will take root in our deeply distorted nephesh, that we might be “Yashar” and live again restored to our potential for doing good as He is good. This is true reconciliation and is when evil is overcome by goodness! Perhaps this is what the prophet Hosea meant in (chapter 6:2): “Come, let us return to Adonai, for He has torn but He will heal us; He has stricken, but He will bind us up..” In conclusion, I would like to say that this fact remains and always will: we cannot rewrite our own personal or collective history to cover up our evil deeds, as seems to be popular these days judging from all the fake news we hear! No matter how we delude ourselves, they are indelibly recorded in Heaven and Earth who both stand as witnesses against us. But our history can and is being redeemed by our Holy G-d! It is Him who works behind the scenes, as He did in Esther’s days, unseen by most, and it is up to each of us to let ourselves be found out, “niveloo” and acknowledge our own failures so we can be led to His great mercy. He is waiting for us to return to him, faithful and always present for those who trust Him and live within His covenant. As the psalmist said in Ps 130:7-8 “O Israel, hope in Adonai, for with Adonai is mercy and with Him is abundant redemption and He will redeem Israel from all his iniquities.”